Quotes: Iraq, Insurgents and Other Messes

Recent quotes I came across in the news. The first four (read in a group) are classic. Unfortunately, they're the only ones that I have been able to verify independently (and perhaps the fifth, but read for yourself):

"The insurgency in Iraq is in its last throes."
~ Dick Cheney (June 22, 2005 - not sure of the exact date, to be honest)

"I believe there are more foreign fighters coming into Iraq than there were six months ago... in terms of the overall strength of the insurgency, I'd say it was the same as it was (six months ago)... I don't know that I would make any comment about that (Cheney's comment above), other than to say that there's a lot of work to be done on the insurgency. I'm sure you'll forgive me for criticizing the vice president."
~ General John Abizaid, Head of US Central Command (June 23, 2005)

"If you look up 'last throes,' it can mean a violent last throe."
~ Donald Rumsfeld (June 25, 2005, ABC Interview)

"We're not going to win against the insurgency. The Iraqi people are going to win against the insurgency. That insurgency could go on for any number of years. Insurgencies tend to go on five, six, eight, 10, 12 years."
~ Donald Rumsfeld (June 25, 2005, SAME ABC Interview as the quote above it. Awfully long violent last throe, isn't it Donny? I think you call that CIVIL WAR)

" I know where Bin Laden is, but I'm not going to tell you. And no, I'm not going to catch him either."
~ Porter Goss, Director of the CIA (June 21, 2005, Sadly, this one is almost true. CNN.com put it this way: "CIA Director Porter Goss says he has an "excellent idea" where Osama bin Laden is hiding, but that the al Qaeda chief will not be caught until weak links in the war on terrorism are strengthened."
I like my way better.)

"Insurgency be damned. We don't know where Bin Laden is. Now leave us alone, but keep giving us money."
~ Pakistan

"Nobody wants to play with me. Or give me money. Or hunt for Bin Laden on my soil. :("
~ India

"HEY! Pay attention to me! I'm actually uprooting settlements! I'm going to displace 150 people in a pathetic attempt to atone for over 50 years of ruthless persecution! Pat on the back please!"
~ Israel

"*sigh* Death to Israel... or something."
~ Palestine

"Why, Henman, Why!!?? Oh, and the invasion was a bunch of jolly old rot, but we'll re-elect Blair anyway"
~ United Kingdom

"Woohoo! Death to America!"
~ Iran

"Holy crap! What have we done??"
~ Rest of Iran

"Y'allz still want the nukes, right?"
~ Russia, to Iran