Saturday, January 17, 2009

Pahari Bakra

I have dabbled in song writing (though it's usually a mistake to call it that in my case) from an early age. And by early, I mean 14ish, when, before school every morning, Moinuddin and I would churn out classics like "We got to cheat, just to make it today" and "In the classroom, in the country, we're doing chemistry."

All our hits paled, though, in comparison to the one monster track, composed in honor of our friend Imran Akbar, who we thought looked like a mountain goat. I could have sworn I had already posted this here, but I can't seem to find it. Anyway, here is Pahari Bakra (Mountain Goat - translation in italics, in case you couldn't tell)

*Opening riff (massive distortion of course):
Jig-jig-jig-jig Jig-jig-jig-jig Chyaon Chyaon Chyaon Chyaon
Jig-jig-jig-jig Jig-jig-jig-jig Chyaon Chyaon Chyaon Chyaon


Mein ne pahari bakra dekha
I saw a mountain goat

Woh khet mein ghaas char raha tha
He was chewing grass in a field

Mein ne kaha,"Aye, Pahari Bakra!"
I said, "Hey, Mountain Goat!"

*Repeat opening riff (still with massive distortion)


Pahari Bakray idhar aa!
Mountain goat, come this way!

Mujhe apna munh dikhaa!
Let me see your face!

Aye, Pahari Bakra!
Hey, Mountain Goat!

*Repeat opening riff (don't forget the massive distortion)

Pahari Bakra nah aaya
Mountain Goat did not come

Woh chehra mur ke bhaag gayaa
He turned his head and ran away

Abay jaa, Pahari Bakra!
Fine then leave, Mountain Goat!

*End with opening riff (yes, the massive distortion)

Someday, someone will give me 2 hours of studio time (plus musicians) as a birthday present. Then I will record this baby and go platinum with it.

Saturday, January 10, 2009

To Those Who Think

that Israel's war crimes in Gaza right now (and against Palestine for years) are in any way, shape or form justifiable,

I am going to move into your house, force you to live in your bathroom without ever leaving, and kill your children if you protest. Alright?

I am going to take over your playgrounds, tell your children to go play in sewage swamps and dung heaps, and kill your parents if you protest. Alright?

I am going to shut down your schools and colleges, declare to the world that you'll never amount to anything, and kill your brothers if you protest. Alright?

I am going to bomb your place of work, inform you it's your own fault you have no hope and no future, and kill your sisters if you protest. Alright?

I am going to disenfranchise you, persecute you, terrorize you, humiliate you, degrade you, dehumanize you, and kill you if you protest. Alright?

Thursday, January 08, 2009

Deaf Girl Mute Girl

The following email conversation occured sporadically between the hours of 0900 and 1600 between Chris, me and someone we will refer to as "Soil" (because Clay would be too obvious):

Soil (early in the morning, no doubt stirred from slumber by this realization):
I want a deaf girl. Yes.
They look so quiet, calm and composed in movies.
And they're always damned cute.
Can you imagine the lack of bitching? If they're moody - you wouldn't even know it (most of the time).

Me (during my lunch break):
You don't want a deaf girl, dummy. You want a mute girl.

Soil (an hour later):
Damn. I was hoping no one had responded yet. Yes, I realized my error halfway to lunch with my parents. One of those deaf girls might be the kind that talks really funny and in an annoying manner - might be worse than 'regular'!

Chris (soon after):
Soil... you need help. Seriously.

Me (right now):
Haha. This is going on my blog.

Thursday, January 01, 2009

Nostalgia Part Deux

I tend to find new years more depressing than uplifting. All they mean are that we're another 365 days closer to death, no? Not that there's anything wrong with death (as long as they have football wherever I'm going).

Today, I thought a lot about where I've been. And where I'm going. But more about where I've been. And here, for your listening and viewing pleasure, are some songs that were prevalent during some of the key moments in my pre-teenage, teenage and post-teenage years. (I think I had a post like this some time ago, hence the Part Deux... ah, here it is, if you care: Time in my Music)

Santa Maria by Oliver Onions - This is my perfect escape song. When it's on and I close my eyes, I'm four again, playing with my Matchbox cars and only worried that Sesame Street is still several hours away. Growing up is such a b**ch. Ha. (Sorry, no moving things in video - just an album cover with two swarthy Italian fellows, or so it would appear.)



All That She Wants by Ace of Base - The omnipresent tune of sunny days and breezy nights through middle school. Poor girl. She leads a lonely life. I wondered many times what it would be like to meet such a girl... one with a lonely life, who would hunt me like I'm a fox. Gosh, that's rather disturbing.



Standing Outside a Broken Phone Booth by Primitive Radio Gods - This was kind of a "coming of age" song for me. I listened to it at a time when friends were leaving, when bonds were breaking, and when I realized that I might be my parents' son all my life, but I didn't have much longer left as a child. The whole "Ma Teresa joins the mob" part is classic. Have a listen.



Collide by Howie Day - Sometimes songs have a significance that only a couple of people can grasp. This is one such song. Funny how it's such a happy song. But such a sad song too. (Sorry no video again, just album cover.)



This isn't all of them obviously. I could blog for days about songs that have played a role in my life, but let's face it, I'm in the entertainment business, and nostalgia only does well for so long.

More later perhaps.

Have a happy new year (if you're into that sort of thing).